Editing Marriage

[[File: Marriage Pact JBC.png|thumb|350px|Marriage Pact by JB Casacop © Fantasy Flight Games]]

A '''marriage''' is the legally or formally recognized union of (usually) two people.<ref>Definition of "marriage" obtained from [https://en.oxforddictionaries.com/definition/marriage English Oxford Dictionaries], retrieved on December 27, 2017</ref> This socially recognized union establishes rights and obligations between the spouses, as well as any biological or adopted children and affinity.<ref>Definition of "marriage" as retrieved from Wikipedia on December 27, 2017</ref> The marriage [[customs]] described in ''[[A Song of Ice and Fire]]'' vary considerably between the lands and major faiths. All appear to be religious ceremonies between one man and one woman (who should not be more closely related than first cousins), involving the exchange of vows in the presence of particular sacred witnesses e.g. a [[septon]] (for the [[Faith of the Seven]]), a [[heart tree]] (for the [[old gods]]),{{Ref|aCoK|34}} or a priest or priestess (in case of the [[Drowned God]] or [[R'hllor]]). The wedding is followed by a feast, where the bride and groom eat and drink with everyone. Afterwards, the bedding takes place, where the marriage is consummated.

==Betrothals==
{{See also|List of known betrothals}}
Most [[wikipedia:betrothal|betrothal]]s among [[nobility]] are to ally with another family, not for love;{{ref|ADWD|68}}<ref name="Mellario"/> such [[wikipedia:marriage of convenience|marriages of convenience]] are also common among the middle class and peasants.<ref name=Mellario>[[So Spake Martin]]: [http://www.westeros.org/Citadel/SSM/Entry/Asshai.com_Interview_in_Barcelona Asshai.com Interview in Barcelona (July 28, 2012)]</ref> According to [[Stannis Baratheon]], "the surest way to seal a new alliance is with a marriage".{{ref|ASOS|76}} Betrothals and marriages can be part of a pledge of support,<ref group="N">Examples include the marriage of [[Margaery Tyrell]] to King [[Renly Baratheon]], King [[Joffrey Baratheon|Joffrey I Baratheon]], and later King [[Tommen Baratheon|Tommen I Baratheon]]; the offer of a marriage of King [[Cleon]] to Queen [[Daenerys Targaryen]]; and the [[secret marriage pact]], in which [[Viserys Targaryen]] is promised military support from [[Dorne]] in exchange for marrying Princess [[Arianne Martell]].</ref> or to help arrange peace between rivals.{{ref|ADWD|48}}

The head of house is expected to arrange matches for his or her children and any unwed younger siblings. Although a lord cannot force the marriage if their dependent refuses to say the vows, this would carry serious consequences.<Ref name="SSM Some_Questions">[[So Spake Martin]]: [http://www.westeros.org/Citadel/SSM/Entry/Some_Questions/ Some Questions (March 16, 2000)]</Ref> An example is Ser [[Brynden Tully]], whose refusal of a girl chosen by his brother and liege, Lord [[Hoster Tully]], caused a severe strain on their relationship.{{Ref|AGOT|71}} While lords do not necessarily arrange marriages for their vassals or household knights, they would be wise to consult him and respect his feelings when arranging their own matches.<Ref name="SSM Some_Questions"/>
Betrothals can be made at a large variety of ages. Children might be as young as two years old (e.g. [[Baela Targaryen|Baela]] and [[Rhaena Targaryen (daughter of Daemon)|Rhaena Targaryen]]),{{ref|FAB|Heirs of the Dragon - A Question of Succession}} though generally betrothals are made when the people involved are somewhat older. Eleven is considered a more normal age for a betrothal,{{Ref|AGOT|4}} though when severe political matters are involved, children might be younger.<ref group="N">For example, the nine-year-old [[Myrcella Baratheon]] is betrothed to the eleven-year-old [[Trystane Martell]] to form an alliance between the [[Iron Throne]] and [[Dorne]] during the [[War of the Five Kings]].</ref>

Betrothals can be broken,{{Ref|ACOK|65}} but this can have serious consequences. When Prince [[Duncan Targaryen]] broke his betrothal to a daughter of Lord [[Lyonel Baratheon]] to marry [[Jenny of Oldstones]], Lyonel rose in rebellion.{{ref|TWOIAF|The Targaryen Kings: Aegon V}}{{Ref|TWOIAF|The Stormlands: House Baratheon}} The breaking of a betrothal might end a military alliance.<ref group="N">When King [[Robb Stark]] breaks his betrothal to a girl from [[House Frey]] to marry [[Jeyne Westerling]], the Freys refuse to lend him any further aid in the [[War of the Five Kings]], culminating in the [[Red Wedding]].</ref>

If a nobleman who has been betrothed dies before a political marriage can occur, a sibling or heir may take his place. An example is the case of [[Brandon Stark]], who died before he could be wed to [[Catelyn Stark|Catelyn Tully]], after which his younger brother and the new [[Lord of Winterfell]], [[Eddard Stark]], married her in Brandon's place during [[Robert's Rebellion]].{{Ref|AGOT|2}}

Though dowries in the [[Seven Kingdoms]] are paid by the family of the bride to the groom’s family,{{Ref|ASOS|37}}{{ref|ASOS|51}}{{Ref|AFFC|41}}<ref>''[[The Winds of Winter]]'', [[Alayne I (The Winds of Winter)|Alayne I]]</ref>{{Ref|TWOIAF|The Reign of the Dragons: The Conquest}} in the [[Free Cities]] this might not be the common practice, as King [[Daeron II Targaryen]] paid a [[dowry]] to the [[Archon of Tyrosh]] as had been promised by his father, [[Aegon IV Targaryen]], when his half-brother [[Daemon I Blackfyre|Daemon Blackfyre]] married [[Rohanne of Tyrosh]].{{Ref|TWOIAF|The Targaryen Kings: Daeron II}}

Instead of betrothals, the men of the [[free folk]] who live [[beyond the Wall]] are expected to prove their worth by "stealing" women from other tribes.{{ref|ASOS|26}}{{ref|ADWD|69}}

==Marriage==
===Age at marriage===
Just as men and women can be betrothed at a large variety of ages, they can also be wed at a large variety of ages, which might depend on the necessity of an heir, or the political environment. While marriages to girls who have not yet reached their majority or even their first flowering have happened, they are rare. Moreover, bedding these girls before they are at the least flowered is seen as perverse. Generally, weddings are postponed until the girl has passed into maidenhood with her [[flowering]] (i.e., has had her first menstruation).<ref name=ageofsexualrelations/> Most highborn girls have their first menstruation at the age of twelve or thirteen.{{ref|AGOT|67}} It is not uncommon for a girl to be married after she has had her first menstruation,{{Ref|ADWD|44}} or within the first year following her first flowering.{{Ref|AFFC|12}} Some may wait until their majority or afterwards (e.g., [[Catelyn Stark|Catelyn Tully]]). Nonetheless, infants have been married so a claim could be placed on a family's lands,<ref group="N">For example, the marriage of the infant Lady [[Ermesande Hayford]], no more than a year old, to [[Tyrek Lannister]].</ref> though this is very rare.{{Ref|ASOS|2}}

Marriages when the bride or groom is under the age of puberty are not consummated,{{ref|affc|12}}{{ref|FAB|Under the Regents - The Hooded Hand}}{{ref|FAB|Under the Regents - War and Peace and Cattle Shows}} though the bride and groom may ceremonially share a bed on the wedding night.{{ref|affc|12}} If a bride is under the age of majority, many husbands will wait until she is fifteen or sixteen before sleeping with her, to avoid the deaths in childbirth that [[maesters]] have recorded for very young mothers.<ref name=ageofsexualrelations/>

===Wedding ceremony===
====Westeros====
In Westeros, the wedding ceremony is a religious ceremony. The bride's father, or the person standing in his place (usually kin or whoever else is closest to living kin), will escort the bride to her future husband and those presiding over the marriage.{{Ref|ASOS|28}}{{Ref|ADWD|37}} Thus far, all the wedding gowns that have thus far been described have been a shade of white.<ref group="N">[[Sansa Stark]] wears a gown of ivory samite when she weds [[Tyrion Lannister]], [[Margaery Tyrell]] wears ivory silk when she weds first [[Joffrey Baratheon|Joffrey I Baratheon]] and then [[Tommen Baratheon|Tommen I Baratheon]], and [[Jeyne Poole]] wears white lambs-wool when she weds [[Ramsay Snow|Ramsay Bolton]].</ref>

In case of the [[Faith of the Seven]], a [[septon]] presides over the ceremony, which involves prayers, vows, and singing,{{ref|ASOS|28}} and takes place in a [[sept]].{{Ref|AGOT|6}} The bride wears a maiden's cloak in the colors of her house.{{Ref|ASOS|28}}{{Ref|ASOS|60}} The bride's father, or the person standing in his place, is to remove the cloak from her shoulders, so that her husband can place a cloak of his own house colors about her shoulders. This signifies the bride passing from her father's protection into her husband's protection. The bride and groom speak the words "With this kiss I pledge my love",{{Ref|ASOS|28}}{{Ref|ASOS|60}} potentially followed with an additional "… and take you for my lord and husband" and "…and take you for my lady and wife" by the bride and groom respectively,{{Ref|ASOS|28}} after which the septon will declare them to be man and wife, stating they are “one flesh, one heart, one soul, now and forever”.{{ref|ASOS|28}}{{Ref|ASOS|60}}

[[File:I take this man by Beelphazoar.jpg|thumb|350px|"[[Arya Stark]]" ([[Jeyne Poole]]), wearing her maiden's cloak, kneels before the [[weirwood]] next to her groom, [[Ramsay Snow|Ramsay Bolton]]. Art by Beelphazoar ©]]

For those who follow the [[old gods]], ceremonies are significantly shorter, and contain no priests. The bride is escorted to her groom, who awaits her in front of a [[weirwood]] tree in a [[godswood]], and a ceremonial conversation follows, where the identity of the bride, of the groom, and of the person giving the bride away are established. The bride is asked to accept her husband, and upon her agreement ("I take this man"), bride and groom join hands, kneel before the [[heart tree]], and bow their heads in token of submission. When they rise following a moment of silent prayer, the groom removes the maiden's cloak, and places the bride's cloak around her shoulders, after which he will carry her to the feast in his arms.{{Ref|ADWD|37}} Vows in the [[north]] can be sworn before both septon and heart tree.{{ref|ACOK|35}} Some [[northmen]] believe that snow during a wedding will lead to a cold marriage.{{ref|ADWD|49}}

[[Valyria]]n wedding ceremonies have occasionally been performed by members of [[House Targaryen]] in Westeros. Little details are known of the rite except that the participants are "wed by blood and fire", and that the officiant can be a woman.{{ref|FAB|The Sons of the Dragon}}{{ref|TWOIAF|The Targaryen Kings: Aenys I}}

====Essos====
Wedding customs in [[Essos]] differ somewhat from Westerosi ceremonies. Weddings done under the [[Lord of Light]] involve [[red priest]]s. A priest (or priestess) recites ceremonial prayers, which are answered by the wedding guests. The priest and groom await the bride by a ditchfire. The bride is escorted to the priest, who first asks the bride to identify herself, and next asks who comes to claim the bride. Both bride and groom are asked whether they will share their fire with their spouse-to-be, to warm him/her "when the night is dark and full of terrors". Bride and groom are to leap over the ditchfire together, to emerge as one. Following this, the groom removes the maiden’s cloak and places the bride’s cloak around the bride’s shoulders.{{Ref|ADWD|49}}

As is traditional in [[Ghiscari]] wedding customs as practiced in [[Meereen]], the female relatives of the groom examine the bride's womb and female parts, to ensure her fertility. Three [[Graces]] witness this ancient ritual, and recite prayers. The bride is to be stripped completely naked for this purpose. After the examinations are done, the women eat a cake baked specially for betrothals, which men are forbidden to taste.{{Ref|ADWD|36}} Usually, the bride is to wash the groom's feet, signifying that she will be her husband's [[handmaid]].{{Ref|ADWD|36}} Under special circumstances, it might be the groom who washes the feet of the bride.{{Ref|ADWD|43}}<ref group="N">When [[Daenerys Targaryen]] marries [[Hizdahr zo Loraq]], she sits in an ivory chair whilst he washes her feet with water from a golden bowl, while fifty eunuchs sing to them.</ref> The bride traditionally wears a ''[[tokar]]'' of white silk, with dark red veils. The ''tokar'' is fringed with baby [[pearl]]s, which symbolize fertility.{{Ref|ADWD|36}} Weddings of the highest nobility in Meereen takes place at the [[Temple of the Graces]]. The ceremony might last up to four hours, and when husband and wife emerge from the temple, they are bound together wrist and ankle with chains of yellow gold.{{Ref|ADWD|43}}

Among the [[Dothraki]], weddings occur beneath the open sky. The ceremony might last the entire day, during which the guests feast, drink, dance, and fight, often to the death.{{Ref|AGOT|11}} Towards the end of the ceremony, the bride is presented with her bride gifts. A ''[[khaleesi]]'' will be presented with a gift from each of her husband's [[bloodrider]]s, which she is to decline and give to her husband instead. Following the receiving of the gifts, the ''[[khal]]'' and ''khaleesi'' will consummate their marriage.{{Ref|AGOT|11}} Following the wedding, the ''khal'' is to present his new bride to the ''[[dosh khaleen]]'' at [[Vaes Dothrak]].{{Ref|AGOT|11}}

The [[Qartheen]] have a custom in which the bride and groom may each ask the other on their wedding day for a worldly token of love which cannot be declined.{{ref|ACOK|40}}

===Celebration===
Wedding ceremonies are usually followed by a feast, which in turn is followed by the [[bedding]].{{Ref|ASOS|28}}{{Ref|ASOS|60}}{{Ref|ADWD|37}}{{Ref|ADWD|49}} For highborn weddings done by the [[Faith of the Seven]], a wedding pie will be presented during the feast, which the bride and groom cut open. The pie is filled with living birds (e.g. doves, [[bluejay]]s, [[skylark]]s, [[pigeon]]s, [[mockingbird]]s, [[nightingale]]s, [[sparrow]]s, [[parrot]]s, or other songbirds), which fly away once the pie is cut open.{{Ref|TMK}}{{Ref|ASOS|60}}

It is considered ill luck to refuse a knight hospitality on your wedding day.{{Ref|TMK}} [[Tourney]]s might be held to celebrate a wedding.{{Ref|TMK}}{{Ref|TWOIAF|The Targaryen Kings: Daeron II}} It is not customary to have melees at a wedding,{{Ref|TMK}} but the [[Golden Wedding]] of {{date|49}} had the [[War for the White Cloaks]], a melee tournament. The ceremony was the largest wedding in Westeros history, with forty thousand guests.{{ref|FAB|The Year of the Three Brides - 49 AC}}

===Consummation===
[[File:Bedding ceremony by Mike S Miller.png|thumb|right|[[Duncan the Tall]] carries the new [[Lady Butterwell]] during the [[bedding]] ceremony after [[wedding tourney at Whitewalls|her wedding]]. Illustrated by Mike S. Miller for the ''[[The Mystery Knight]]'' [[The Hedge Knight (comics)|graphic novel]].]] 
{{Main|Bedding|First night}}

In [[Westeros]], the bedding takes place after the feast. The bride is escorted to her bedroom, usually by the male guests from the feast, who will undress the bride along the way while making rude jokes.{{Ref|TMK}}{{Ref|ASOS|51}}{{Ref|ASOS|28}} The women at the feast will do the groom the same honors.{{Ref|ASOS|28}}{{Ref|TMK}} Usually, once the bride and groom are in the bedchamber they are left alone, though wedding guests might stand on the other side of the door, shouting suggestions.{{Ref|ASOS|28}} Nonetheless, in some cases, witnesses might be present for the bedding,{{Ref|ACOK|35}} though it is unknown how far this witness duty goes.

Women, more so for noble women, are generally expected to be [[maiden|virgins]] on their first wedding night. After some weddings, the bedsheets are displayed to show the blood, thereby proving the breaking of the bride's maidenhead and thus her virginity at her wedding night. However, since it is known that [[horse]]riding can break a girl's maidenhead, few families are insistent on physical proof.{{Ref|AFFC|28}} 

Even though it is rare for a marriage to occur before the bride has had her first flowering, they do sometimes occur. However, it is considered to be perverse to bed a bride who is so young.<ref name=ageofsexualrelations/> Nonetheless, it is considered to be bad luck for the marriage if the man to sleep apart from his bride on their wedding night.{{Ref|AFFC|12}}

Lords in Westeros once had the right to the [[first night]], the custom of bedding newly-wed women before their husbands. Queen [[Alysanne Targaryen|Alysanne]] convinced King [[Jaehaerys I Targaryen|Jaehaerys I]] to abolish it,{{Ref|TSS}}{{Ref|aDwD|43}} but it is still practiced illegally in some parts of the [[north]].{{Ref|aDwD|32}}

===Surnames after marriage===
{{Main|Customs#Surnames}}

Upon marriage, most women take their husband's surname.<ref name=SF>[[So Spake Martin]]: [http://www.westeros.org/Citadel/SSM/Entry/SF_Targaryens_Valyria_Sansa_Martells_and_More SF, Targaryens, Valyria, Sansa, Martells, and More], June 26, 2001</ref> However, usage can vary. For example, while Catelyn is referred to most frequently as "Catelyn Stark", she is also referred to as "Catelyn Tully"{{Ref|AGOT|35}}{{Ref|ADWD|41}} and "Catelyn Tully Stark".{{Ref|AGOT|10}}{{Ref|AGOT|34}} If the family of the woman is significantly higher born than the family of the husband, the wife might chose to use mostly her maiden name, and her husband's name little, or not at all.<ref name=SF/> 

A married noblewoman ruling in her own right retains her house name (e.g., [[Anya Waynwood]], [[Arwyn Oakheart]]), though sometimes it is uncertain whether her husband was also of that house (e.g. [[Tanda Stokeworth]], [[Shella Whent]]). The consort of the reigning monarch retains her surname (e.g., [[Cersei Lannister]], [[Margaery Tyrell]], and [[Alyssa Velaryon]]), as does the spouse of a royal prince (e.g., [[Laena Velaryon]]).{{Ref|FAB|Heirs of the Dragon - A Question of Succession}} Conversely, a royal princess may take on the surname of her husband, but may prefer using the name of their royal house (e.g., [[Baela Targaryen]] and [[Rhaena Targaryen (daughter of Daemon)|Rhaena Targaryen]], or Baela Velaryon and Rhaena Corbray).{{Ref|FAB|Under the Regents - War and Peace and Cattle Shows}} 

In [[Dorne]], customs vary from the rest of [[Westeros]]. As firstborn children inherit in Dorne, following [[Rhoynish]] customs, females more frequently inherit their family's lands and titles. In such cases, they do not take the name of their husband.<ref name=SF/>

In rare cases, a man may take his wife's surname. For example, [[Joffrey Lydden]] married the daughter and only child of King [[Gerold III Lannister]], and when the king died without male issue, Joffrey was crowned by a council and took the name of [[House Lannister]], becoming Joffrey Lannister.{{Ref|TWOIAF|The Westerlands}} Ser [[Bronn]] of the Blackwater, born [[smallfolk]] without a surname and married to Lady [[Lollys Stokeworth]], has been called "Lord Stokworth",{{Ref|AFFC|32}} although it is not yet certain if he is actively going by the name "Bronn Stokeworth".

==Legality, divorce, and annulment==
Vows said at swordpoint are not held to be valid,{{Ref|ACOK|35}} and in theory, a person cannot be declared to be married if they refuse to say the vows.{{Ref|ASOS|80}} However, there can still be issues of consent even if vows are spoken willingly. Marriages may be conducted between children or babies.{{Ref|ACOK|2}}{{Ref|ACOK|25}} Even if the marriage occurred under force, a lord might claim the marriage to be legal if lands are at stake.{{Ref|ACOK|35}}

In the religion of the [[Drowned God]], it is possible for someone to be married by proxy, without their consent and without saying the vows for oneself.{{Ref|ADWD|26}} However, as such a marriage has thus not been consummated, it can easily be set aside again.<ref name=windstheon>''[[The Winds of Winter]]'', [[Theon I (The Winds of Winter)|Theon I]]</ref>

Divorce in [[Westeros]] is not common.<ref name=Asshai>[[So Spake Martin]]: [http://www.westeros.org/Citadel/SSM/Entry/Asshai.com_Interview_in_Barcelona/ Asshai.com Interview in Barcelona (July 28, 2012)]</ref> Instead, man and wife might decide to live separately (e.g., [[Doran Martell]] and [[Mellario]]).{{Ref|ADWD|68}} 

Marriages in the [[Seven Kingdoms]] can be ended in several ways. In the Faith of the Seven, a marriage that has not been consummated can be set aside by the [[High Septon]] or a [[Council of Faith]].{{Ref|ASOS|32}}{{Ref|AFFC|8}}{{ref|FAB|A Surfeit of Rulers}} A marriage which has been consummated can be set aside,{{ref|ACOK|44}}{{ref|TWOIAF|The Targaryen Kings: Viserys I}}{{ref|TWOIAF|The Targaryen Kings: Aegon V}}{{ref|TWOIAF|The Westerlands: House Lannister Under the Dragons}}{{ref|FAB|The Sons of the Dragon}}{{ref|FAB|Under the Regents - The Hooded Hand}}{{ref|FAB|Under the Regents - The Voyage of Alyn Oakenfist}} even a marriage of many years with children.{{ref|TWOIAF|The Reach: The Gardener Kings}}{{ref|TWOIAF|The Reach: Oldtown}} Even a king is able to put his queen aside—even if she has given birth to his children—and marry another.{{Ref|AGOT|8}}{{Ref|AGOT|32}}{{ref|TWOIAF|The Targaryen Kings: Aerys I}} Neither bride nor groom needs to be present for an annulment, but it must be requested by at least one of the wedded pair.<Ref>[[So Spake Martin]]: [http://www.westeros.org/Citadel/SSM/Entry/Minisa_Tully_and_Sansa/ Minisa Tully and Sansa (September 08, 2000)]</Ref>

Another way of ending a marriage is by having the bride join the [[silent sisters]].{{Ref|TMK}} Similarly, when a man takes the vows of the [[Night's Watch]], his marriage is over.{{Ref|ASOS|70}}

==Polygamy==
[[File:Aegon and his sisters by Amok (detail).jpg|thumb|right|350px|[[Aegon I Targaryen|Aegon the Conqueror]] with his sister-queens, [[Visenya Targaryen|Visenya]] (left) and [[Rhaenys Targaryen|Rhaenys]] (right), by Amok ©]]
{{Main|Polygamy}}
While most marriages are between only one man and one woman, [[polygamy|polygamous]] marriages do occur in the [[known world]].

Before the [[coming of the Andals]] to [[Westeros]], [[Garland II Gardener]], a [[King of the Reach]] known as the Bridegroom, had multiple wives. In order to marry the daughter of Lord [[Lymond Hightower]], he put his other wives aside.{{ref|TWOIAF|The Reach: The Gardener Kings}}{{Ref|TWOIAF|The Reach: Oldtown}} According to the songs, [[Ronard Storm]] was a [[Storm King]] with twenty-three wives.{{ref|TWOIAF|The Stormlands: House Durrandon}}

Though not a common practice, the [[dragonlords]] and sorcerer princes in [[Valyria]] sometimes took multiple wives.{{ref|TWOIAF|The Targaryen Kings: Aenys I}} King [[Aegon I Targaryen]], who invaded [[Westeros]] and united six of the [[Seven Kingdoms]] under the rule of one monarch, had wed both of his sisters.{{Ref|TWOIAF|The Reign of the Dragons: The Conquest}} While the [[Faith of the Seven]] does not allow polygamy and considers it to be a sin,{{Ref|TWOIAF|The Iron Islands}}{{ref|TWOIAF|The Targaryen Kings: Aenys I}} Aegon I's rule was accepted. In fact, during his [[Aegon's Conquest|Conquest]], Aegon received a proposal from the Storm King, [[Argilac Durrandon]], who offered his daughter [[Argella Durrandon|Argella]] as a wife to Aegon, while [[Sharra Arryn]], Queen Regent for [[Ronnel Arryn (king)|Ronnel Arryn]], [[King of Mountain and Vale]], offered herself in marriage to Aegon as well.{{Ref|TWOIAF|The Reign of the Dragons: The Conquest}} Aegon's younger son, [[Maegor I Targaryen]], is the last Targaryen known to have taken multiple wives. In doing so, he upset the Faith, resulting in his own exile.{{Ref|FAB|The Sons of the Dragon}} However, according to Maester [[Yandel]], [[Daemon I Blackfyre]] believed he would be able to take two wives.{{Ref|TWOIAF|The Targaryen Kings: Daeron II}}<ref group="N">Additionally, according to [[Jorah Mormont]], [[Daenerys Targaryen]] is able to take two husbands.</ref>

While followers of the [[Drowned God]] may take only one [[rock wife]], with whom they have trueborn children, they are allowed to take multiple [[salt wife|salt wives]]. Children fathered on salt wives are not considered to be bastards, and may even inherit if there are no heirs by a man's rock wife.{{Ref|TWOIAF|The Iron Islands}}{{Ref|ACOK|11}}

Among the [[Dothraki]], at least the ''[[khal]]'' is known to be allowed to practice polygamy. For example, Khal [[Jommo]] is known to have four wives.{{Ref|AGOT|46}} Additionally, according to the "ancient ways", a ''khal'' might share his ''[[khaleesi]]'' with his [[bloodrider]]s, a custom still practiced in some ''[[khalasar]]s''.{{Ref|AGOT|36}}

==History==
[[File:Maegor marries Alys Harroway - HBO Histories and Lore Season 7.png|thumb|400px|Prince [[Maegor I Targaryen|Maegor Targaryen]] takes [[Alys Harroway]] as his [[polygamy|second wife]] in a [[Valyria]]n ceremony officiated by Dowager Queen [[Visenya Targaryen]]. Screencap from ''[[Game of Thrones]]'' Blu-ray.]]

In the [[Valyrian Freehold]] it had been custom among the [[dragonlord]]s to marry brother to sister, or, if that was not possible, an uncle to a niece, or an aunt to a nephew. Also accepted were [[polygamy|polygamous]] marriages, though this practice was less common. The Valyrians had their own religious ceremonies, though a priest does not seem to be a necessity here, as Queen [[Visenya Targaryen]] was capable of officiating a wedding performed per this Valyrian ceremony.{{Ref|TWOIAF|The Targaryen Kings: Aenys I}}

In {{date|12}} during the [[First Dornish War]], the [[Wyl of Wyl]] and his men interrupted the wedding of Ser [[Jon Cafferen]] and [[Alys Oakheart]], killing the guests, [[eunuch|castrating]] the groom and gang-raping the bride and her [[handmaid]]s, and selling the women into [[slavery]].{{ref|FAB|Reign of the Dragon - The Wars of King Aegon I}}

[[House Targaryen]] continued their marriage customs after [[Aegon's Conquest]], even though the [[Faith of the Seven]] saw [[incest]] as a vile sin.{{Ref|TWOIAF|The Targaryen Kings: Aenys I}} The Faith also objected to [[Maegor I Targaryen|Maegor Targaryen']]s multiple marriages. The marriage of Prince [[Aegon Targaryen (son of Aenys I)|Aegon Targaryen]] to his sister, Princess [[Rhaena Targaryen (daughter of Aenys I)|Rhaena]], contributed to [[Faith Militant uprising|an uprising]] by the [[Faith Militant]]{{ref|FAB|The Sons of the Dragon}} which began during the reign of King [[Aenys I Targaryen]],{{Ref|TWOIAF|The Targaryen Kings: Aenys I}} and continued during the reign of King Maegor the Cruel.{{Ref|TWOIAF|The Targaryen Kings: Maegor I}}{{ref|FAB|The Sons of the Dragon}}

In {{date|49}}, the [[Golden Wedding]] between Dowager Queen [[Alyssa Velaryon]], the mother and [[regent]] of King [[Jaehaerys I Targaryen]], and [[Rogar Baratheon]], [[Lord of Storm's End]] and [[Hand of the King]], was considered the most glorious event in the history of Westeros.{{Ref|FAB|The Year of the Three Brides - 49 AC}}

[[File:dragonstone_wedding.jpg|thumb|right|350px|The wedding of King [[Jaehaerys I Targaryen]] and Queen [[Alysanne Targaryen]] on [[Dragonstone]], as depicted by Douglas Wheatley in ''[[Fire & Blood]]''.]]
King Jaehaerys I and his sister, Princess [[Alysanne Targaryen]], married secretly in {{date|49}} to prevent Alysanne from being married to another.{{Ref|FAB|The Year of the Three Brides - 49 AC}} They did not consummate the marriage until after Jaehaerys [[coming of age|came of age]] and took the throne; their public wedding ceremony in {{date|51}} was followed by a bedding.{{Ref|FAB|A Time of Testing - The Realm Remade}} 

In {{Date|54}}, King Jaehaerys I Targaryen worked out the [[Doctrine of Exceptionalism]] with the [[Faith of the Seven]] in order for them to tolerate the continued practice of incestuous marriages by House Targaryen.{{Ref|FAB|A Time of Testing - The Realm Remade}}

With the help of Septon [[Barth]], Queen Alysanne Targaryen convinced King Jaehaerys I Targaryen to abolish the [[first night]] in {{date|58}}.{{ref|FAB|Jaehaerys and Alysanne - Their Triumphs and Tragedies}}

In {{date|120}}, the wedding of Princess [[Rhaenyra Targaryen]] to her uncle, Prince [[Daemon Targaryen]], caused a great scandal at court, as it took place less than six months since the deaths of Rhaenyra's previous husband, [[Laenor Velaryon]], and Daemon's previous wife, [[Laena Velaryon]].{{ref|FAB|Heirs of the Dragon - A Question of Succession}}

The [[wedding of Aegon III Targaryen and Jaehaera Targaryen]] in {{date|131}} helped to bring peace after the [[Dance of the Dragons]].{{ref|FAB|Under the Regents - The Hooded Hand}} However, [[Jaehaera Targaryen|Jaehaera]] died in {{date|133}}, and [[Aegon III Targaryen|Aegon]] chose a new wife, [[Daenaera Velaryon]], from more than thousand maidens presented to him at the [[Maiden's Day Ball]].{{ref|FAB|Under the Regents - The Hooded Hand}}{{ref|FAB|Under the Regents - War and Peace and Cattle Shows}}

When King [[Baelor I Targaryen]] came to the throne in {{date|161}}, he convinced the [[High Septon (Baelor I)|High Septon]] to dissolve his marriage to his sister [[Daena Targaryen|Daena]], since it had been contracted before he had become king and was never consummated.{{Ref|AFFC|13}}{{Ref|TWOIAF|4|9}} 

In {{date|187}}, the [[Wedding of Maron Martell and Daenerys Targaryen|marriage]] of [[Maron Martell]], [[Prince of Dorne]], to Princess [[Daenerys Targaryen (daughter of Aegon IV)|Daenerys Targaryen]] marked the joining of [[Dorne]] and the [[Seven Kingdoms]].{{ref|TWOIAF|The Targaryen Kings: Daeron II}}

The feud between Ser [[Eustace Osgrey]] and Lady [[Rohanne Webber]] ended with their wedding in {{Date|211}}.{{ref|TSS}}

In {{Date|212}}, the [[wedding tourney at Whitewalls|wedding tourney]] at [[Whitewalls]], held by Lord [[Ambrose Butterwell]] to celebrate his second marriage to [[Lady Butterwell|the daughter]] of [[Lord Frey]], was the grounds for the [[Second Blackfyre Rebellion]].{{ref|TMK}}

King [[Aerys II Targaryen]] sent [[Steffon Baratheon]], [[Lord of Storm's End]], to the [[Free Cities]] in {{date|278}} to find a suitable match for his heir, Prince [[Rhaegar Targaryen]].{{ref|ACOK|Prologue}} After Steffon's failed mission and death, Rhaegar wed [[Elia Martell]].{{ref|TWOIAF|The Targaryen Kings: Aerys II}}

[[Hoster Tully]], [[Lord Paramount of the Trident]], wed his daughters [[Catelyn Stark|Catelyn]] and [[Lysa Arryn|Lysa]] to [[Eddard Stark]], [[Lord of Winterfell]], and [[Jon Arryn]], [[Lord of the Eyrie]], in a [[Weddings of Catelyn and Lysa Tully|dual ceremony at Riverrun]] during [[Robert's Rebellion]] in {{date|283}}.{{ref|ASOS|2}} The [[wedding of Robert I Baratheon and Cersei Lannister]] was held after the war to bind [[Tywin Lannister]], [[Lord of Casterly Rock]], to the new king's cause.{{ref|AGOT|30}}

After 13-year-old [[Tyrion Lannister]] helped rescue [[Tysha]], a smallfolk girl, from an attack by bandits, they made love and then were wed by a drunken [[septon]].{{ref|AGOT|42}} They lived together for a fornight, but once Tywin heard of it, he had his son's marriage undone, and Tysha punished and sent away.{{ref|AGOT|42}}{{ref|ACOK|41}}

Prince [[Doran Martell]] and Ser [[Willem Darry]] arranged a [[secret marriage pact]] to wed [[Arianne Martell]] to [[Viserys Targaryen]].{{ref|AFFC|41}}

==Recent Events==
===''A Game of Thrones''===
[[File:Sept13 Wedding Feast II.png|thumb|350px|[[Drogo]] and [[Daenerys Targaryen]] at [[wedding of Drogo and Daenerys Targaryen|their wedding feast]], by Sept13 © Fantasy Flight Games]]
[[Sansa Stark]] is betrothed to Prince [[Joffrey Baratheon]], the heir of King [[Robert I Baratheon]].{{ref|AGOT|4}}{{ref|AGOT|15}}

The [[wedding of Drogo and Daenerys Targaryen]] is held outside [[Pentos]].{{ref|AGOT|11}}

[[Walder Frey]], [[Lord of the Crossing]], is [[Wedding of Walder Frey and Joyeuse Erenford|wed]] to [[Joyeuse Erenford]] on his ninetieth [[name day]].{{ref|AGOT|28}}{{ref|AGOT|59}}

As part of an alliance, [[Robb Stark]] promises to wed a daughter of Lord Frey once fighting ends in the [[Seven Kingdoms]].{{ref|AGOT|59}}

Following Robert's death, [[Renly Baratheon]] claims the [[Iron Throne]] and is [[Wedding of Renly Baratheon and Margaery Tyrell|wed]] to [[Margaery Tyrell]] at [[Highgarden]].{{ref|AGOT|69}}{{ref|AFFC|31}}

===''A Clash of Kings''===
[[Ramsay Snow]] abducts Lady [[Donella Hornwood]]{{ref|ACOK|28}} and forces her to marry him before both [[septon]] and [[heart tree]].{{ref|ACOK|35}} Maester [[Luwin]] is skeptical of the marriage's validity, however.{{ref|ACOK|35}}

The [[wedding of Roose Bolton and Walda Frey]] is held at the [[Twins]].{{ref|ACOK|39}}{{ref|ASOS|37}}

The infant [[Ermesande Hayford]], [[Lady of Hayford]], is [[Wedding of Tyrek Lannister and Ermesande Hayford|wed]] to [[Tyrek Lannister]].{{ref|ACOK|42}}

Following the [[Battle of the Blackwater]], King Joffrey is released from his betrothal to Sansa so that he can instead wed the widowed Margaery.{{ref|ACOK|65}}

===''A Storm of Swords''===
[[File:RobotDelEspacio Joff death.jpg|thumb|350px|[[Purple Wedding|Joffrey's death]], by Josu Hernaiz ©]]
[[House Tyrell]] plots to wed Sansa to [[Willas Tyrell]],{{ref|ASOS|6}} but [[House Lannister]] forces the girl to instead [[wedding of Tyrion Lannister and Sansa Stark|marry Tyrion Lannister]].{{ref|ASOS|28}}

House Frey ends their alliance with Robb after the [[King in the North]] weds [[Jeyne Westerling]].{{ref|ASOS|14}} [[Edmure Tully]], [[Lord of Riverrun]], agrees to wed [[Roslin Frey]] to restore the alliance.{{ref|ASOS|35}} Robb, his mother [[Catelyn Stark|Catelyn]], and many of his bannermen are betrayed and murdered by the Freys and [[House Bolton|Boltons]] in the [[Red Wedding]], however.{{ref|ASOS|51}}

Joffrey dies at his [[Purple Wedding|wedding feast]] after marrying Margaery.{{ref|ASOS|60}}

[[Lysa Arryn]], [[Lady of the Eyrie]], weds Lord [[Petyr Baelish]] in a [[wedding of Petyr Baelish and Lysa Arryn|ceremony at the Fingers]].{{ref|ASOS|68}}

===''A Feast for Crows''===
King [[Tommen Baratheon|Tommen I Baratheon]] marries Margaery [[wedding of Tommen I Baratheon and Margaery Tyrell|within the Red Keep]].{{ref|AFFC|12}}

Lord [[Lyonel Corbray]] is [[wedding of Lyonel Corbray and Lady Corbray|wed]] to a [[Lady Corbray|merchant's daughter]] at [[Gulltown]].{{ref|AFFC|41}}

===''A Dance with Dragons''===
[[File:Alys Sigorn by Rae Lavergne.jpg|thumb|350px||[[Alys Karstark]] and [[Sigorn]], by Rae Lavergne ©]]
The [[wedding of Ramsay Bolton and Arya Stark]] is held at [[Winterfell]].{{ref|ADWD|37}}

The widowed [[Daenerys Targaryen]] marries [[Hizdahr zo Loraq]] in [[Meereen]].{{ref|ADWD|43}}

[[Jon Snow]], [[Lord Commander of the Night's Watch]], helps arrange the [[wedding of Sigorn and Alys Karstark]].{{ref|ADWD|49}}

==Quotes==
{{quote|A [[Dothraki]] wedding without at least three deaths is deemed a dull affair.{{ref|AGOT|11}}|[[Illyrio Mopatis]] to [[Daenerys Targaryen]]}}

{{quote|If truth be told, I ofttimes wonder how [[Stannis Baratheon|Stannis]] ever got [[Shireen Baratheon|that ugly daughter]] of his. He goes to his marriage bed like a man marching to a battlefield, with a grim look in his eyes and a determination to do his duty.{{ref|AGOT|27}}|[[Renly Baratheon]] to [[Petyr Baelish]]}}

{{quote|The [[Lysa Arryn|Lysa]] who came back from [[King's Landing]] is not the same girl who went south when her husband was named [[Hand of the King|Hand]]. Those years were hard for her. You must know. [[Jon Arryn|Lord Arryn]] was a dutiful husband, but their marriage was made from politics, not passion.{{ref|AGOT|34}}|[[Brynden Tully]] to [[Catelyn Stark]]}}

{{quote|Boys might play with swords, but it took a [[lord]] to make a marriage pact, knowing what it meant.{{ref|AGOT|59}}|thoughts of [[Catelyn Stark]]}}

{{quote|There was this to be said for weddings over battles, at least; it was less likely that someone would cut off your nose.{{ref|ASOS|4}}|thoughts of [[Tyrion Lannister]]}}

{{quote|[[Robb Stark|Your brother]] was a terrible traitor, I know, but if we start [[Red Wedding|killing men at weddings]] they'll be even more frightened of marriage than they are presently.{{ref|ASOS|60}}|[[Olenna Tyrell]] to [[Sansa Stark]]}}

{{quote|'''Barristan''': I saw [[Aerys II Targaryen|your father]] and [[Rhaella Targaryen|your mother]] wed as well. Forgive me, but there was no fondness there, and [[Seven Kingdoms|the realm]] paid dearly for that, my queen.<br>'''Daenerys''': Why did they wed if they did not love each other?<br>'''Barristan''': [[Jaehaerys II Targaryen|Your grandsire]] commanded it. A [[woods witch]] had told him that [[the prince that was promised|the prince was promised]] would be born of their line.{{ref|ADWD|23}}|[[Barristan Selmy]] and [[Daenerys Targaryen]]}}

{{quote|What has love to do with marriage? A prince should know better. [[Doran Martell|Your father]] married for love, it's said. [[Mellario|How much joy]] has he had of that?{{ref|ADWD|69}}|[[Gerris Drinkwater]] to [[Quentyn Martell]]}}

==Notes==
{{Notes}}

==References==
{{References|2|
refs=<ref name=ageofsexualrelations>[[So Spake Martin]]: [http://www.westeros.org/Citadel/SSM/Entry/Age_of_Sexual_Relations_in_Westeros Age of Sexual Relations (October 5, 1999)]</ref>}}


{{weddings}}

[[Category:Weddings| ]]
[[Category:Culture]]


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